Saturday, September 1, 2012

The Messy Side of Motherhood

Looking at my sweet little Lydia, it's hard to imagine her being anything less than perfect. Could I ever picture her doing something to completely gross me out? Not a chance... until last Wednesday, that is. We had a day that tested my gag reflex.

If you're squeamish, I'll understand if you slam your laptop closed, and stop reading this post; the next one will be cleaner, I promise.

Lydia is a constipated kid. We give her Miralax to help keep things moving. She missed a few days, but the dose following did a marvelous job. While in the bath, I noticed a serious face. Setting her wet little body on the toilet, I was so proud to have saved myself from a huge mess, a craptastrophe, as I call it.

With business complete, she was once again splashing in her clean bath. Seconds later, my victory smile faded. She pooped, a lot. Wrapping her in a towel, I set her on the floor and cleaned the tub and bath toys. Placing her in freshly clean, warm water, I began scrubbing her down. All was well, until... you got it, more poop.

Wrapping her in a towel again, I cleaned out the bath. With fresh water filling, I reached down to scoop her into the tub, only to find that our soft and cozy memory foam rug had been destroyed. Sigh. I texted Josh (picture included, although I will spare you the visual) letting him know that I had no intention of scrubbing the rug clean, we would be purchasing a new one. Finally, my baby was sweet and clean at last. Josh arrived home that afternoon with a new rug. The bathroom was back to normal...

Returning to work that evening for the beginning of the school year open house, Josh was out the door. As usual, Lydia smeared as much avocado in her hair, on her face, tummy, and arms as she ate. She's a bath after every meal kind of eater. Off to the tub she went.

With Lydia happily splashing in the water, Annika began her bedtime routine. As I turned from helping Annika open her Tom's Silly Strawberry Toothpaste, I saw what made the earlier events of the day seem like nothing. Lydia had once again "loaded" the tub, and as I yelled, "Not to eat!" scooped a handful of poo into her mouth. My first instinct? Rush her to the ER! I collected myself (sort of) and called both my mother-in-law and my mom. Both agreed that while disgusting, her little "snack" was most likely harmless.

With the bathtub clean again, I picked Lydia up to set her in fresh water, and noticed that she had peed on the new rug. Oh well, at this point, a little baby pee doesn't bother me a bit.

Here she is, looking as cute and innocent as can be, just after the incident. "Who, me?"
So what's your grossest parenting moment? And sorry Mom, no need to post yours; I heard it the other night ;)